Following Christ

Matthew 9:16

As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector’s booth. “Follow me,” he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him.

A couple of weeks before I left for Minnesota, I was studying Matthew and read this passage. This passage had never perplexed me before, but it did this time. Why would Matthew get up and follow Jesus no questions asked? Had God been preparing his heart beforehand? Was there something in the tone of Jesus’ voice that made Matthew say yes? What made him follow? I had not found an answer when I was offered a quite handsome scholarship to Rivendell Sanctuary in Bloomington, Minnesota on Thursday, December 29^th.

I had been planning on going to this college next January when I had saved enough money. But with this scholarship, it gave me more money than I could earn in one year. So if I stayed home I would be wasting money in a way. I know that money is not the most important thing, and I definitely considered many other things before I decided.

The week after I got back home from Summit Semester, I thought that God desired me to stay in Utah for whatever reason he had in mind. Therefore, I got used to living at home, had developed a schedule, and had started my job at Maceys. When I got the call with the offer of the scholarship, I was totally unprepared. The day before I had called Rivendell and told them that I couldn’t come due to finances. That Thursday, I was completely confused. At first, I barely considered it. Then as the night went on and I was given advice from family members, I began considering it more heavily. The next day at work, I fasted and prayed, yet my stress increased when I realized I had to call and give Rivendell my decision that night. In the middle of my work day, the scene from the book of Matthew popped into my mind. Matthew left everything, his family, his job, his home, to follow Jesus wholeheartedly. Now I knew that my decision did not compare to Matthew’s at all. His service was probably more important than my going to a college a thousand miles away. But I was faced with the problem of leaving my family after only having four weeks with them after being away from home for three months; I would have to leave a good paying job; I would have to give up my money and go into a bit of debt; and I would have to go into the unknown. When I thought of Matthew, I decided that I could do it too, if it was God’s will(as sure as you can be in those kind of situations). My sister reminded me that I hate making decisions quickly. I always have to pray and think and seek wise counsel before making a serious decision; this sometimes takes months. However, she brought up the point that maybe God wanted to test my trust in him by putting this decision and this opportunity before me. Maybe he wanted me to take a leap of faith into the unknown and to trust him, for he is a faithful God. These two points were the major ones that helped me to decide.

So I said yes to God and yes to Rivendell. Some obstacles appeared, but thankfully they were taken care of. On Friday, my dad booked my plane ticket. On Saturday I told my boss I had to quit my job(thankfully he was understanding in my crazy predicament and put me on seasonal instead of having me quit altogether). For the next couple of days, I spent time with family, packed, and said goodbye to as many people as I could. Every single day I struggled with second thoughts, sadness about leaving my family again, stress, anxiety, not knowing if I was really doing God’s will…so much went through my mind. On Tuesday I worked for a couple hours, my parents picked me up, and took me to the airport. There I said goodbye and boarded my plane. I was sad, but as I focused on where my God was taking me, excitement filled me! The stress left. It was amazing. I arrived in Bloomington, Minnesota around ten on Tuesday, so exactly a week ago(I just realized that). It’s crazy that I’m here..haha. I will definitely fill you in on my journeys so far, but I thought I should let you know about my journey before coming here. Thanks for reading! And yes I am crazy, but God calls some of us to do crazy things.